I’ve noticed as a mom that I get asked a lot of questions. No, they are not all from my 16-month-old son or my best friend’s daughter, who is 2. Many of them are from other adults. It started right after Mark and I got married, actually.
Before you have kids, people always ask you, “So when are y’all having kids?” I was asked this many times before we (finally) got pregnant. I understand that most people are simply curious as to when they get to see the adorable offspring between a couple. What a lot of people don’t understand is that not everyone wants to announce that they are “trying” to have a baby. It’s kind of personal, folks. Of course, I let my best friends know that we were trying. I needed someone to cry with me each month that we hadn’t conceived, and to be among the first to rejoice when we had. Sometimes, it’s hard to have a baby. A lot harder than most think. I had two chemical pregnancies and two miscarriages before finally being able to carry Mikey. Though they aren’t intending to be cruel with their questions, it can be very hard to answer. If you’re not actively trying for a baby, a simple, “We’re just not ready for that yet. We are enjoying the time with just the two of us.” can work. But, if you are trying, it can be a bit tricky, especially if you haven’t let the cat out of the bag yet. I used to tell people, “Whenever the Lord is ready to give us one, we’re ready too.”
You would think that after actually having a child, the questions would ease up a bit. Oh ho! Wrong! I am constantly being asked when we are going to have another baby. At first, I just said, “We’re just getting used to the first one! We’re not ready for a second yet!” Now, however, we are ready for another baby. Mikey is almost a year and a half old, and we feel like it’s a good age gap right now. So yes, if you didn’t know, we are trying for a second baby. We realize this time around that it may not be easy. It took us a year and a half to get Mikey, after all. We aren’t stressing out about the fact that we haven’t conceived right away. We are enjoying the time that we have as a family of three while we can. Mikey will never again be an only child when the new one comes. If it happens that we cannot get pregnant again, then yes, we are very happy and blessed with the one perfect child that we have.